As we head into the holidays, family's on the brain more than ever. Some noncustodial parents are able to spend a little more quality time with the kids than they get to when school is in session. But there are also many noncustodial parents who aren't going to be able to visit with their kids at all. I just visited with my son in California a couple weeks ago, so he's not coming out to NY for Thanksgiving as he did last year. His dad's taking him to Mexico for Christmas, and unfortunately Skype is definitely out (even if they were going to have internet access, his dad's not much of a computer person). So the next time I'll see my son will probably be in the New Year. It's sad, but knowing how excited my son is about Mexico makes it easier, and we've definitely had longer stretches between visits.
My heart aches for the noncustodial parents who are so mired in endless battles over custody & visitation that they are prevented from seeing their kids at all. At least I know when I'm going to see my son. Some haven't seen their children in months or even years -- and next visit is TBD. I cannot imagine the sadness, especially during the holiday season.
"How long is your wait?" I posed this question on our
NonCustodial Parent Community Facebook page, and moms and dads chimed in quickly - some with excitement, some with sadness...
- Three more days here. :)
- Two weeks until I see my girls.
- No clue. :'(
- Tomorrow night, thank god.
- have no idea :(
- I dunno...I wish I knew. A few months at least. :(
- 4 days.... 5 months is sooo long. so happy to see her. but after my 4 days it will be another 6 months, the hardest part of the year.
- I see my kids for 2 weeks at Christmas and then I (maybe) get a week in the spring. Otherwise, I don't see them for 6 months ....
Regardless of your situation, there is a community of support for NonCustodial Parents. We know better than anyone else the challenges we face, just getting through the day sometimes. How long is your wait? Share your story here....
♥ NC-Mama ♥
"How long is your wait?" I posed this question on our NonCustodial Parent Community Facebook page, and moms and dads chimed in quickly - some with excitement, some with sadness...
My wait has been 8 months and no visits planned this year. My boys are 17 and 21 now. OK, I know they are older than probably most of the long distance kids, but still, I miss them terribly. They are my boys, and I chose to remarry and move away, allowing them to choose to come with me or not, back in 2003. It has been 7 years of being away, seeing them as much as I can afford. But now with the economy, I can't afford to fly the 1237 miles to see them. My heart aches, and there is nothing I can do. All I have are texts and emails, a phone call if I am lucky. This is the toughest deal I have ever had to do, thanks for letting me share.
ReplyDeleteerika@longdistanceparent.com
I'm seeing my children again this Friday through Monday, then over Christmas break. There's 800 miles between us and I fly there every 2-3 wks, plus they spend all holidays, school breaks, and summer with me. However, it's NEVER enough. NEVER. I was a stay at home mom for 8 yrs until my divorce and this is almost unbearable. I continue to go through the courts (we have joint legal/physical) because I feel its in my childrens best interest to be with me during their school days...so all of my money goes to flights and attorneys. Anyway, it's just the most difficult thing ever...
ReplyDeleteMy wait has been 8 years, and it will either be a couple of years from now, if I can figure a way to have a Guardian Ad Litem or a Child Advocate to represent my child to get visitation reinstated OR at the longest will be 7 more years when our child turns 18. There is no worse pain in the world than loving someone so much and not being able to see them and be apart of his life.
ReplyDeleteI am not able to go and get my daughter this Christmas. I missed her third birthday. I was not able to see her in November. I have one week out of every month and I live in a different state. It is so hard and I have not idea how to deal with it sometimes.
ReplyDelete